Blog 11: Data set 4

Question:
What kinds of comments do teachers/professors write that require students to revise their work?
*Discussion will be about the article "How to Guide: Argument Writing"

Codes:
-Student text: This text is present on the left side of the page.  The background color of the student text is white as opposed to the right portion/margin of the page that is shaded grey.
-Highlighted text: Throughout this article there are highlighted words that are linked to one of the teacher's/professor's comment boxes.  There are two instances where the teacher/professor highlights a word or words.  First, the teacher/professor may highlight a word or words contained within a sentence.  Second, the teacher/professor may also highlight the last word of a paragraph.
-Right portion/margin: The right margin of this article is shaded grey and contains multiple comment boxes.
-Comment Box: Annotations within the margin.  These boxes were placed there by the teacher/professor.

Categories:
-Comment Boxes:  There are nine comment boxes that are almost identical to one another.  They contain a heading, title, and text.  In the article "How to Guide: Argument Writing" the comment boxes are titled with "Mark's Laptop" and the date and time in which the comment was created.  The headings for each comment box begin with the word "Comment" then a number.  That number found next to the word "Comment" increases as the boxes continue down the right margin of the page.  After each heading, the teacher/professor had written his/her followup comment(s).  There is text found in every box.
-Highlighted text: The shaded areas found within the student's writing, which usually contains one or a few words.

Patterns:
-Highlighted text linked with Comment Boxes:  All of the highlighted text found within the student's essay is grouped with one of the comment boxes found within the margin.
Example: From "How to Guide: Argument Writing":
      Highlighted text-->James A. Herrick     Comment box 3: "Herrick's textbook..."  When the teacher/professor highlights a word or group of words found in the middle of a sentence, he/she is talking specifically about the idea.
      Highlighted text-->college (last word in the paragraph)      Comment box 2: "Except for the part I marked above, this overview works well. " Focus is not on that particular word, but the whole paragraph.


Language:
1)Teacher/Professor comments:
      The comments by the teacher/professor are written in first person and have a casual tone.

First person:  
From "How to Guide: Argument Writing":  Comment 1--> "I like...here.  This feels tacked on to me...transition."  "I like..." and "[t]his feels tacked on to me..." refers to the first person (i.e. teacher/professor).

Casual tone:
"I like...", "Nice..." and "I wonder..." are all examples of casual talk.

2)The teacher's/professor's comments are composed of statements or a statement+question.
From "How to Guide: Argument Writing":
      Comment [1]: "I like the opening hook up to here.  This bit feels tacked on to me, as well as throwing off a natural transition."= [statement].
      Comment [5]: "These points are clear.  I wonder, though, if this might be a place to play off students' definitions of argument.  How do these views contradict or enrich their expectations of what an argument should be?"= [statement]+[question]

*However, these statements and questions can be broken down further.
Statements=criticism (subjective statement by the teacher/professor), constructive criticism (teacher/professor praises a portion of the text, then offers his/her point of view on the matter), positive criticism (praise), advice (what the teacher/professor thinks would be better).
From "How to Guide: Argument Writing":
      Comment [4]: "I'm not sure I see how these definitions inform your overview."= criticism
      Comment [8]: "The basic ideas of this paragraph are clear, but I feel they could be taken further."=constructive criticism
      Comment [6]: "Nice choice of example."= positive criticism
      Comment [3]: "One of the theorists Herrick discusses would be a stronger choice."= advice    
           
Questions-->clarity (clear up the ambiguity), expansion (go further into detail), clarity+expansion (combination of clarity and expansion).
 From "How to Guide: Argument Writing"
      Comment [4]: "What's the underlying philosophy that's guiding your view of argument?"= clarity
      Comment [7]: "Can you say more about how they fit together?"= expansion
      Comment [9]: "Why is it important in this situation?"= clarity+expansion

Grouping the common language structures found in the comments.
1) Most of the comments are written in a statement+question format.
From "How to Guide: Argument Writing":
      Comment [4]: "I'm not sure I see how these definitions inform your overview.  The previous comment and this one both ask the same question: What's the underlying philosophy that's guiding your view of argument?"= [statement]criticism+[question]clarity
      Comment [5]: "These points are clear.  I wonder, though, if this might be a place to play off students' definitions of argument.  How do these views contradict or enrich their expectations of what an argument should be?"= [statement]constructive criticism+[question]clarity+expansion
      Comment [7]: "The logical connection between the sentences isn't clear to me.  Can you say more about how they fit together?= [statement]criticism+[question]expansion
      Comment [8]: "The basic...further. Why...argument?  The bullets...ignore."= [statement]constructive criticism+[question]clarity+expansion+[statement]constructive criticism
      Comment [9]: "Some...first. Why...situation?"=[statement]criticism+[question]clarity
2) The rest of the comments are written as statements.
      Comment [1]: "I...here.  This...transition."=[statement]constructive criticism+criticism
      Comment [2]: "Except...well"=[statement]constructive criticism
      Comment [3]: "Herrick's...here.  One...choice."=[statement]constructive criticism+advice
      Comment [6]: "Nice choice of example."=[statement]positive criticism

*Comment [6] seems to be the only comment that doesn't require the student to revise.

Blog 8: Updated Research Plan

Statement of purpose:
In conducting this research, I hope to prove or disprove music's influence/affect on creative writings (i.e. poems, short stories).

Detailed statement of your research question:
New gadgets such as iPods, iPhones, and iPads have enabled humans to listen to music while doing any activity.  Knowing that, I will bring up the following questions:  1) Can listening to music influence/affect what students write in their creative pieces? 2) If yes, how does the writing reflect the influence of music? (what the student is writing? tone? verb usage?) 3) If no, how is listening to music affecting his or her writing? 4) Does the genre of music affect how a creative piece is written?

List of the information you need to gather:
-I will interview a few students in the English major and ask them if they write while listening to music.   The interview will expand upon what the student listens to and whether or not music influences their writings.
-I will conduct a survey on whether students listen to music while they are writing and what genre of music they listen to when they write.  The purpose of this survey is to get quantitative information on the subject.
-I will also conduct an autobiographical analysis on my own creative pieces.

Primary list of resources:
-http://www.jstor.org/stable/40170700  This article is titled, "The Effect of Four Types of Music on Spontaneous Writings of High School Students."  This article pertains to my own research question; however, the article is quite old (1976).
-http://dspace.sunyconnect.suny.edu/handle/1951/44971 "The effects of background music on student performance."  This article is similar to the one previous listed and was published in 2009.
-I will also research the Mozart effect.  This term seems to pop up frequently when researching this specific question.
-http://futurescholars.rutgers.edu/FutureScholars/Images/Soundtracking%20Our%20Selves.pdf  This article is very exciting.  The researcher seems skeptical of music's influence on creative writing; however, at the end of the research, the researcher realizes that music does have an influence on her student's writings.

Plan for gathering the information:
-I will interview three English majors at the Starbucks at Kean University.  The interviews will have open ended questions so that I can get qualitative information on my research project.
-I will conduct a survey of English majors at Kean University for quantitative purposes.  I will hand out surveys to students within my writing classes.  My goal is to get at least 20 surveys.
-I will perform my own autobiographical analysis.  In doing so, I can get a first hand account of music's affect on writing.

Blog 10:

1)During Thursday's class, we saw how the language used in the English survey can be confusing.  In this case, the survey included vocabulary known to its creators (English professors), yet, unknown to the surveyors (students).  Because of the vocabulary within the survey, we could see the presence of a social language (i.e. English Professor language).  For example, Kean students going into the English program may not understand the terminology "discourse analysis" or "textual analysis"; however,  Kean's English professors know these terms.

2) Surveys offer researchers a quick and easy way to gather information.  This information can be used to discuss numbers along with results of a survey.  For example, a researcher could state that out of ... surveys, ...  people ... while eating.  These results would give hard information without the why? component. 

3) After Thursday's class, I learned that surveys can be extremely hard to create for a few reasons.  1) Surveys have to be concise to keep the surveyor's attention.  2)  The language used in the survey has to be written so that the audience could understand.  3)The person doing the survey needs to know its purpose.  If the researcher fails to address the previous reasons, the results of the survey may be unreliable. Hence, participants may gun-deck the information on the survey.  On the other hand, if the researcher tries to adjust the survey (i.e. making it concise) for his or her participants, then the survey may not address all of the researcher's questions.  

Post 9: Survey Analysis

Objectives and the statements which best suite them:
Objective 1--->1, 5, 12, 14, 15, 16--->All of these statements deal with the writing process.

Objective 2---> 7, 8, 11, ------------>These statements deal with analysis. *I also believe that 1 can be here also. (Rob)

Objective 3---> 2, 4, 6--------->These statements pertain to research.

Objective 4---> 10,13------------------->Both of these statements talk about presentations.

Objective 5---> 3,9---------------------->Both of these statements relate to discussions.

Statements 16,17, 18, 19--------------> All these statements relate to an individuals overall experience academically.

Statement 1: practice------->"I...revise" A statement about an individual's revision tactics.

Statement 2: feeling-------->"I am confident" This statement is about an individual's confidence in conducting research.

Statement 3: knowledge--->"I know..." This statement either confirms or denies an individual's ability to make connections.

Statement 4: practice/knowledge--->"I am able to use textual analysis..." Practice and knowledge because the individual most be able to use textual analysis.

Statement 5: practice------------------>"When I revise..." Another statement about an individual's writing process, which is revision.

Statement 6: practice/knowledge--->"I am able to use discourse analysis..." same as 4

Statement 7: practice----------------->"I use writing..."A statement about the use of writing.

Statement 8: feeling------------------->"I feel..." An individuals feeling about starting a discussion.

Statement 9: knowledge-------------->"I know..." The individual knows how to.

Statement 10: feeling------------------>"I am comfortable..." Another feeling statement.

Statement 11: practice/knowledge-->"I am able to interpret..." Both because they need experience and knowledge to perform the actions in the statement.

Statement 12: practice----------------->"When I revise..." Another statement about the writing process.

Statement 13: practice/knowledge--->"I have given a presentation..." Both again.

Statement 14: practice----------------->"When I revise..." Another writing process statement.

Statement 15: practice----------------->"I typically brainstorm..." Another writing process statement.

Statement 16: overall writing experience--> ranking yourself as a writer

Statement 17: overall reading experience-->ranking yourself as a critical thinker

Statement 18: overall speaking experience-->ranking yourself as a speaker

Statement 19: overall thinking experience---> ranking yourself as a critical thinker

What definition(s) of "writing" and "learning" is assumed by this survey?

Are those definitions a good match for the definitions assumed by the student learning outcomes?

Are they a good match for the way the students taking the survey will define writing and learning?

How might you change this survey so that it could provide a more accurate reflection of what students learn in this program? List your suggestions.

The "Writing" statements used in this survey focus their attention on the writing process. According to the survey, "Learning" pertains to literature analysis and literary research. This is all based on an academic level.

Matching the questions to the statements:

We agree that most of these statements fit the survey; however, we feel that there are some statements that should be re-worded or revised for the students taking the survey.

Statement 2: I am confident...

Statement 8: I feel comfortable...

Statement 10: I am comfortable...

The modifiers used in these sentences take away from the statement. For example, statement 10 says, "I feel comfortable giving presentations." However, the objective states that, "students will demonstrate ability to give a compelling oral presentation." I, for one, am not comfortable giving presentations, but I can give one. In this case, We would disagree with the statement. Perhaps, the statement should be, "I am able to give a presentation." With that said, we feel there should be an option where you have both sides, where it's a little bit of both. It's not always just agree or disagree. Sometimes it's a little bit of both and there is no option for that.

Statement 12: "When I revise my first draft, I spend most of my time on grammatical issues."

We are guessing that this statement falls within the first objective: Students will produce essays through a series of drafts that include exploratory writing and talk, as well as revisions that include addition, deletion, substitution and rearrangement. However, after reading this goals, we don't see "grammatical issues" anywhere within the objective.

We also believe that the survey needs some type of organization (unless that was the surveyors intentions). The survey jumps from the writing process to research to presentations, which takes away the surveyors focus. If there was organization within the survey, the surveyor could give their full attention to one aspect (e.i. writing process) before moving onto another topic.

The objectives listed above focus on core English classes.  However, in order to graduate with a degree in English students must also take creative writing and writing for cyberspace.  With that, we then asked why there aren't statements pertaining to the courses just named.

Blog 7: Formulated Research Plan

1. Statement of Purpose:
-Determine if listening to music affects the way writers write.

2. Detailed statement of your research question:
-Does music affect the way we write?
-Does music influence what we write?  Example, if a writer listens to a love song will he/she write something romantic?
-Do writers use different vocabulary in their work when listening to one artist opposed to another?
-Do writers change writing styles when listening to one artist opposed to another?

3. List of information I need to gather:
-Famous writers that listen to music when they write and how it has influenced their writings.
-The people I am specifically targeting: Age.  Sex. How many subjects?
-define music
-define the different genres in music e.g. rock, classical, r&b


4.Preliminary list of sources
-http://www2.widener.edu/~cea/381riecken.htm
-http://www.jstor.org/stable/40170700
http://www.jwu.edu/uploadedFiles/Documents/Academics/JWUGradCRETeenMusicAdrianoDipaolaPVD.pdf
-http://wac.colostate.edu/jbw/v14n2/johnson.pdf
-http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00228958.2005.10518822
-http://dspace.sunyconnect.suny.edu/handle/1951/44971

*Unfortunately these articles/journal entries cost 20$ or more.

5. Plan for gathering information:
-autobiographical discourse analysis on my own writing
-interviews with individuals who write while music is being played
-Maybe a questionnaire? Questionnaire would include music and a mad lips sample. Still unsure.  Would have to confirm with Dr. Chandler.

Blog 6: Discourse Community

Is our class a Discourse community?  In order to answer that question we must define the goals, lexis, and genres within this class.

Goals.  The main goal in this specific class is to get a better understanding of Research in Language and Literature.  There are also individual goals set out by everyone in the class.  Professor Chandler, in doing her Q&A on Thursday, wants us to succeed in our research projects.  Then there are the students in the class that want to get good grades.  For example, I want to come out of this class with a decent grade.  For those not majoring in writing studies, we can say that their goal would be to pass so they can continue their journey in their specific major.

Lexis.  Our class has a unique language.  That is, we speak in terms not common in everyday vernacular.  For example, in Thursday's class we used the words "ethnography" "Discourse" "fieldnotes" to discuss our research projects.  If someone from the outside came into our classroom(e.i. IT tech), he or she would not have a clue as to what we were talking about.

Genres.  Of course the language being used in class would be worthless if we didn't understand what was being discussed.  With that said, our class uses specific literature to help us understand the course.  For example, we use An Introduction to Discourse Analysis by James Paul Gee to assist us in learning about the material.  There are also articles we use to further our knowledge about research.  Then there is Professor Chandler's blog, which is used to further discuss what was being taught in class.

Judging from the three distinct characteristics above, our class is a Discourse community for writing studies and writing majors at Kean University.  As a Discourse community we have common goals, whether it is to understand Research in Language and Literature or receive a decent grade.  Being that we use terminology (i.e. ethnography) rarely used in everyday talk, we can say that our class has its own lexis.  Additionally, the class has its own literature which assists students in understanding the terminology being used.

I say that the Discourse community aims at those registered in "English-writing studies" and "English-writing option" for a few reasons.  For those going into writing studies, this course introduces them to research in literature and language.  On the other hand, for those planning on majoring in English with emphasis in writing, they are required to take this particular course.  Although, English majors in the writing emphasis option won't necessarily need to take another class on research, they should come out of this course being able to interact with someone majoring in writing studies.

Blog 5 1/2

Notes on Discouse Community:

It's February 7, 2013.
The time is approximately 1150.

Professor Chandler is standing in front of the class asking us if someone would like to share their research project idea.  We, the students, are sitting down at our seats.  Joanna, who sits in the front right corner of the room, volunteers her information.  Professor Chandler responds enthusiastically to Joanna's research topic.  Jillian, who sits by the door, looks rather unenthusiastic and is staring at the professor.  The professor again asks if anyone else would like to share; she is still standing in front of the class.  Jillian tells us about her research topic.  Professor Chandler comments on Jillian's idea, giving Jillian more options to explore.  Krista tells the class her research topic.  Again, Professor Chandler responds.

Side notes:
-Professor Chandler joked about a 200 page dissertation.
-Krista's phone buzzed
-side conversations occurring while professor is teaching

Blog 5

Question: Choose one of the possible research projects you have been thinking about and brainstorm the kinds of thinking materials you would need to discuss in your introduction for a research essay on this project.

Research project: Online dating

-Background information: What is online dating?  List reasons why people date online.  Name some of the different dating found websites .

-Discuss how I gathered my information: Getting info directly from website and female profiles.  How many women I researched? Identify the specific age group I am studying (18-30).  List where these women are located in American?

-Identify terms used on these websites:  Example: What type of fish are you: (Shark, Sea Urchin, etc.)  What is a profile? Define the "for" option?

-Why I am researching this specific topic:  I am investigating the profiles of women on online dating websites, to find what they consider "attractive" in men.  I'll look into the patterns and common themes women used to describe their typical match.

Blog 4: Individual Analysis

Question: How does the language used in Shaggy Dog stories affect its overall meaning?
     *Analysis will cover the Panda story.

Significance: How is this piece of language being used to make certain things significant or not and in what ways?   
      -"A giant panda escapes from the zoo in New York."  Not just any old panda, but a giant panda had escaped the zoo and entered into New York.  This first sentence sets the initial mood of the story and is significant to the reader/listener.
      -"Eventually, he found his way downtown and walked into a restaurant, where he found a seat at an empty table." The jokester follows the dangerous scenario of a wild animal roaming around New York with something totally out of the ordinary.  By stating this sentence, the joke teller is down playing the significance by giving the lost panda human characteristics (i.e. "found his way downtown", "walked into a restaurant", and "found a seat").
      -"The maitre d', being a native New Yorker figure he's seen stranger things." Again, the jokester is lessening the significance of the occasion by stating that this isn't the craziest thing he has ever seen.
*These events are purposely placed to build up the suspense in the story.
   
     Patterns:
      -The panda escaped a zoo in New York-->The panda finds his way into a nice restaurant, where he seats himself and orders food.
      -The panda eats, then calmly gets up, pulls out a gun and shoots patrons and waiters-->Maitre d' asks the panda a question, rather than running for cover.
*These are two instances of conflict and resolve, which add suspense to the story.     

-"eats shoots and leaves" plays a major part in the reader's/listener's understanding of the story.  "Eats shoots and leaves" means the panda is munching away on bamboo.  On the other hand, "eats, shoots, and leaves" is exactly what occurred in the story.

Relationship: What sort of relationship or relationships is this piece of language seeking to enact with others?
      Being that the Panda story is set in New York and ends with a play on grammar, we would assume that the jokester is telling the joke to someone who knows English (scholar, writer, editor, grammarian, etc.) and New York's reputation.
      -"A giant panda escaped from the zoo in New York."  The listener or reader would have to understand that New York has a zoo (Bronx), despite being the a city.
      -"[The panda] found his way downtown" contains the word "downtown," which is associated with New York terminology.
      -"The maitre d', being a native New Yorker figures he's seen stranger things than this" references New York and its reputation.  New York is eccentric.
      -The panda tells the maitre d' to look up the definition of a panda.  This action relates to someone looking up a word in a dictionary, encyclopedia, or any other reference device.
      -The rookie cop retrieves an Encyclopedia Brittanica, volume P.  Again, this suggests a relationship with someone scholarly (i.e. grammarian, scholar).
      -The final sentence says, "Giant panda, lives in China, eats shoots and leaves."  This last sentence is a play on punctuation.  Again the relationship of this sentence points at grammarians, scholars, and/or someone with knowledge of the English language.

Conversations:
      -Although the reader/listener might not believe this ridiculous story about a panda dining in a fancy New York restaurant, from what people know about New York, the story isn't far fetched from the type of people and events that go on in the big city.

Intertextuality:
      This Shaggy Dog stories touches upon familiar contexts; thus, the actions of the panda can be seen as being "gangster".  The way the panda "blows away several customers and a couple of the waiters"is reminiscent of gangster movies we have all seen on television or the movies.  The story's final sentence, "eats shoots and leaves"is also the title of a New York Times bestseller called Eats, Shoots & Leaves by Lynne Truss.



Analysis: How does the language used in Shaggy Dog stories affect its overall meaning?
   
      In order for the joke teller to make the panda story effective the jokester must build up the story, connect the themes contained within the story with facts about New York, and add emphasis on the last line.
      The jokester builds up suspense by sequencing the events within this joke.  For example, the giant panda escapes a zoo in New York.  Ideally, this event is dangerous since a wild animal on the loose can kill humans.  However, he down plays the scenario when he informs the reader/listener about the panda's arrival at a restaurant.  The suspense then builds up again when the panda "blows away several customers and a couple of the waiters."  Again, the story teller stifles the suspense by including the maitre d's conversation with the panda.  After the panda leaves, the maitre d' tells the police what happened and what the panda said before he left.  The staging of events contained within this story is important because it suspends the reader/listener in limbo (what will happen next?) until the final sentence.  However, the sequencing of events isn't the only tool the jokester uses to make the joke effective.  He/she also uses themes that connect with New York and its denizens.
     Being that the panda story is set in New York adds to the joke's punch line.  As most of the American population know, New York is bizarre.  With that said, we can clearly see this in the story when the maitre d' notices the panda enter the restaurant: "The maitre d', being a native New Yorker figures he's seen stranger things than this."  Although, this idea is absurd, it connects the reader/listener to the story.
     Now that the jokester has set up the story with sequencing and connections, he or she could deliver the punch line: "Giant panda, lives in China, eats shoots and leaves."  This last sentence is very important because it can be interpreted in two ways.  "Eats shoots and leaves" means the panda was eating a healthy dose of bamboo.  On the other hand, "eats, shoots, and leaves" is what occurred in the story.  The punctuations or emphasis on the words within the punch line make all the difference on how the joke comes across to its audience.